Wendy's will be discontinuing the widely disliked hamburger sandwich.

DUBLIN, OH—Representatives for the restaurant chain Wendy's announced Tuesday that due to the item's continually dismal performance, the company would be discontinuing the widely disliked hamburger sandwich.

The hamburger sandwich, which Wendy's sources described as a ground beef "patty" placed between vegetables and two slices of bread, has long been the restaurant's worst-selling menu item, leading executives to decide that the time had finally come to phase it out of all 6,650 Wendy's locations.

"For more than 40 years, we've tried in vain to get the hamburger sandwich to catch on with our customers, but it is now clear that we're never going to make that happen," Wendy's CEO Roland Smith told reporters. "We knew from the beginning that the hamburger sandwich wasn't going to be for everyone, but we still hoped in vain that it might develop a nice little niche following over time. Unfortunately, it never did."

"After millions of dollars and countless man-hours, we have arrived at a very simple truth," Smith added. "People just flat-out don't like hamburger sandwiches."

Originally devised as an alternative to classic Wendy's favorites like the cucumber tea sandwich or the watercress-and-beet salad with a light vinaigrette, the hamburger sandwich has languished on the restaurant's menu for decades, due largely, officials claimed, to an unwillingness among customers to order something outside their comfort zone.

While the company has experimented with variations on the hamburger sandwich over the years, Wendy's representatives said such efforts have all been met with quizzical reactions—and sometimes even outright revulsion—from customers.

"Honestly, we tried everything," Wendy's research and development head Charles Cullen said. "We tried including free packets of our tomato catsup sauce, but people said the sauce was too sweet. Then we tried putting some cheese on top of the patty, but people didn't like how the cheese melted on the meat. We even tried stacking two hamburger sandwiches on top of each other, but of course everyone hated that because it just meant having to eat more hamburger sandwich."

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"There's just something about the combination of flavors in a hamburger sandwich that naturally turns people off," Cullen added.

Company sources also announced that they would be phasing out their unpopular French-fried potatoes, which were added to the menu in an ill-fated, and some said bizarre, attempt to find a pairing for the hamburger sandwich—a combination deemed "thoroughly unappetizing" by 95 percent of Wendy's customers in a recent survey.

The side item will reportedly be replaced by the restaurant's beloved fresh celery sticks in all combo-meal deals.

Though Wendy's has sunk nearly $150 million dollars into the hamburger sandwich project since 1969, Smith maintained that Wendy's would remain financially solvent.

"Every company tries new ideas, and every company has successes and failures," Smith said. "Back in 1991, when we added windows to our restaurants where you could pick up your food in your car, we heard our customer's complaints loud and clear: 'Cars are for driving and food is for eating. Don't try to mix the two.' And so we stopped. This whole hamburger sandwich debacle will be no different."

Wendy's, of course, is only the latest in a series of fast-food restaurant chains to fail on a large scale with the hamburger sandwich: Similar botched attempts have been made by McDonald's, Carl's Jr., Jack in the Box, and the short-lived all-hamburger-sandwich concept restaurant Burger King, which opened and closed its doors within eight months in 1994.

Many industry analysts are saying that continued failure to introduce new products into an already established restaurant chain can have dire financial consequences.

"We've seen many companies in the past nearly bankrupt themselves with these kinds of ideas," food industry analyst Norm Horwitz said. "Look at KFC with their disastrous bucket-full-of-breaded-and-fried-chicken campaign. Or Dairy Queen with their cup full of ice cream and cookies. Perfect examples of why restaurants should stick to what they know."

"In my opinion, they'd all be better off if they stopped trying to think outside the box and just gave people what they wanted already," Horwitz continued. "Something simple like a nice bowl of zucchini goulash with a side of quinoa, and maybe an omega-3 fish oil supplement for the ride home." (http://www.theonion.com)

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Beware the Facebook "Dislike" Button

Facebook recently expanded the "Like" feature, allowing users of the social networking site to "like" individual comments to a given post, and expanding the application of the voting system to other sites. Now, a malware scam is circulating that exploits the demand from Facebook users for its antithesis--the "Dislike" button.

The Like button, and the ability to Like Facebook pages are popular tools. The Like feature provides a framework for users to help promote good content by voting for it with the Like button. However, many users wish they could also police bad content by giving it the thumbs down with a Dislike button.

The Facebook Dislike button scam works the same as many other viral messaging scams on Facebook. It eggs the recipient on by teasing--or imploring depending on the wording--that the Facebook friend has downloaded the "official DISLIKE button" and provides a link to download it and be part of the in-crowd.

Graham Cluley from security vendor Sophos highlighted the viral Facebook threat in a recent blog post. "Falling for any of these scams (which promise some lurid or eye-popping or exclusive content) typically trick you into giving a rogue Facebook application permission to access your profile, posting spam messages from your account and asking you to complete an online survey."

Cluley explains "If you do give the app permission to run, it silently updates your Facebook status to promote the link that tricked you in the first place, thus spreading the message virally to your Facebook friends and online contacts," adding "But you still haven't at this point been given a "Dislike" Facebook button, and the rogue application requires you to complete an online survey (which makes money for the scammers) before ultimately pointing you to a Firefox browser add-on for a Facebook dislike button developed by FaceMod."

Facemod does not appear to be connected to the scam. Its Firefox add-on is simply providing the ammunition that the scam needs to lure people into clicking the link and completing the survey to generate revenue for the scammers.

For organizations that allow even limited use of social networking sites such as Facebook, there is an underlying concern that IT admins should be aware of. This scam illustrates how easy it is to exploit the social nature of a site like Facebook--adding an inherent element of trust for messages that come from known friends.

IT admins should ensure that users are educated about the risks and provide guidance not to click on such links. This particular scam simply propagates itself virally and does no real harm per se, but having users in the habit of clicking links just because they come from trusted connections on a social network is an open door for malicious attacks as well.

Ultimately, do we really need a "Dislike" button? Didn't your mother teach you that if you don't have something nice to say, just don't say anything at all?

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